Fear

Someone told me something today that really struck me.  This person told me that I should be proud of myself.  Mind you... this person had no idea who I was.  He had only known me for about 15 minutes.  Not to toot my own horn or anything, but I think he's right.

His words reminded me of how insecure I feel about my abilities to achieve my goals.  It's upsetting to think that quite often as I'm trying to complete a task, I'll whisper under my breath, "I can't do this.  I really don't know if I can do this."  Well, it might be time to give myself more credit.  But before I can do that...I need help figuring this out.

My worst enemy is my fear.  Period.  There is nothing more crippling than fear.  It has the potential to stop me from doing anything I've set my mind to.  I really do think that if I didn't have this fear constantly knocking at my door, I would feel the most profound freedom.  My new friend today helped me to chip away at my fears by making me realize that I should be proud of who I am.  I should be proud of what I have accomplished and eventually I have to believe that I can do anything.  If I'm afraid, I'll always be hesitant.  If I'm afraid to fail, I'll never learn from mistakes.

Fear stops us from doing what we want to do.  I think that's true for anybody.  People are afraid to sacrifice what's comfortable to them.  For example, maybe there is something I want to do that I'm really passionate about, but I'm hesitant to make that change because whatever it is that I want to do won't bring in much money.  I'm giving up that comfortable life, the life that I know.  I honestly think that the only way for us to grow is to challenge ourselves and to go into the zone of discomfort.  We absolutely have to make sacrifices.

But I'm still so afraid.  As much as I can say that I want to make a change, acting on it is a whole other ballgame. With change, there are desirable reasons for it and resisting factors against it.  My desirable reasons and my resisting factors are endlessly at war in my mind.  How can this be resolved?  Believing that I can do something is much different than actually doing it.  I need to make that transition from belief to action.

With all of this said,  I'm attaching a video that I saw today that reminded me of all this.  I was watching it on my way home from clinical and I almost cried.  I felt an urgency in my heart to do something after watching it.  I think it was my body trying to tell me that I needed to act on what I was hearing.  I think my heart was on fire (metaphorically, of course).  It's motivating and it's really forcing me to answer the question, What do I desire?

What if Money Was No Object